The emotions associated with that day are still very fresh. The tears still well up in my eyes when I think of those first days. The first emotions were fear of the unknown and the urgency in which the ER team came around her. Usually you have to wait to be seen by the ER doctor after the nurses have been in to take vitals. Our ER doctor was waiting for us in the room with 3 nurses and 2 IVs already on the pole along with insulin to piggyback. The first things out of her mouth were notifying me that they had already called Children's to see if they had an available bed in the PICU. That will put fear into a parent.
After the initial shock wore off, my fighting spirit kicked in. I needed to be strong for Sara and advocate for her as needed. I asked question upon question and when I wasn't asking them, Daniel was. We wanted to know everything and the doctors and nurses were kind to us and tried to explain everything they were doing. We were blessed to have wonderful doctors and nurses the whole time Sara was hospitalized.
I still have times when I just break down. especially when I think of her future. While it is true that she can do and be anything she wants, there are also limitations. Yes, she can drive, but because she has a condition that can cause blackouts, she has to have a waiver from her doctor. Yes, she can get married and have children, but she can't have a home birth. This disease will affect EVERYTHING she does and every decision she makes for the rest of her life.
1 month ago - our lives changed forever.
We are stronger. I never would have thought that I could give my own daughter injections multiple times a day. I don't like needles and I hate having to hurt my daughter, even if it is just feels like a pinprick. Yet I have had to give her over 112 injections in the last month. She has pricked her own finger over 180 times in the last month. That's only in 1 month and she has a lifetime to go. We may cry lots of tears and endure heartache, but we are stronger because of it. We will not let Type 1 bring us down. We will fight and we will fight until there is a cure.
1 month ago - our lives changed forever.
Our faith is stronger. God knew from the beginning of time that our daughter was going to have this disease. He knew the day she was going to go into DKA and be hospitalized. Not one part of this was out of His control. Type 1 is making us stronger, but not because of anything we are doing. We don't have to fight this disease alone. We have days that we feel overwhelmed and feel alone, but we aren't because God is carrying us through these hard days and He will be there right beside us forever.
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